It has been a crappy week. Monday night Baby O woke up in the middle of the night, which is very unlike her. When she woke up Tuesday morning, she was running a slight fever that climbed to 101.5 by noon. The temp was quickly followed with coughing and an extremely runny nose. I went into crazy-mom mode.
Out came our homeopathic children's cough & congestion medicine, the echinacea, garlic pills, Juice Plus (more on this wonderfulness later) and everything else I could think of to boost my immunity, and therefore, boosting O's immunity because she solely nurses. We sat in steam and used our Nose Frida (google it - AMAZING), and I basically walked around the house offering her my breast any time she would take it so that she'd stay hydrated and get my antibodies into her system. Sorry for that mental image, but I'm happy to say that it's now Thursday night, and she's back to her sassy self with a pretty minor runny nose.
Unfortunately, by 'sassy-self' I mean, she's her sassy-self plus the attitude that comes after two whole days being utterly and completely catered to due to sickness. She doesn't quite understand that I can't (and won't) do this to her all the time. Thus, today was what I refer to as the "purging."
The purging is like the day after you get back from vacation, and the reality sinks in that you don't have people to make your beds every morning or convenient ready-made breakfast muffins at your disposal or a car your kids can demolish with backseat snacks. The day when you sit around doing nothing, nothing happens, and you get annoyed by it. "Where is my room service?" you think, angrily, before realizing you're back home, and you are the room service.
Now imagine that response infant-style. It has a lot to do with yelling, crying, waving of arms and other such forms of aggravations that you see from tiny humans. It is the best form of birth control known to man. It is also the cause of motherly breakdowns and the cause of said mother banging her head repeatedly against the wall in an attempt to deafen herself to the sounds of her tantrum-throwing offspring. Toss another infant into the equation (however sweet Apple is - she was easy today, at least as far as babies go) who needs to be taken care of and loved on, and you've got the beginnings of a craptastic day.
So when I received a voicemail (because I couldn't pick up the phone due to my screaming child) that I had won a drawing from Natural Grocers, I had reason to celebrate.
Little background story...
My mother, the ever illustrious, Grandma Max, has a winning gene. If she signs up for a drawing, she has a creepily high percentage rate of winning. Over the years she's won an Xbox 360, DVD player (back in the early 2000's when people not only knew what VCR's were, but owned them), various baked goods, raffles, and a trip to Walt Disney World. Yeah, you read that correctly. She won a trip to Disney World. I don't know if it's her Christian morals that keeps her from buying lotto tickets, but you can bet your bottom dollar I'd be, if I was that lucky. Anyhow...
I have been waiting for something wonderful enough to bring GIF's to my blog, and this was it. I can't even relate to you what the sporadic, scary thrashing I called a happy dance looked like. In my imagination, it was something akin to these:
I'm pretty sure I was sing-scream-yelling like one of those people on Oprah when she gives out free stuff. And again, a visual:
The gyrating of my hips was probably what scared O into silence (for like, a minute) and gave me enough time to call Mr. D at work and tell him the good news.
"That's awesome! What is it?"
I stopped... I didn't know. The thrill of winning something on a day when I felt like a total mommy-loser had completely erased my curiosity.
"Um.. I don't know, but when are you coming home for lunch?"
From there, I basically browbeat my poor husband into taking an early lunch so that he could come home and watch the girls for ten minutes while I ran over to pick up my prize. When Mr. D arrived, I literally threw O into his arms, grabbed the keys, gave a spirited 'woo-hoo', and left. On my way to the grocery store, I contemplated what I could have won. A mountain bike? An iPad? Maybe a lifetime supply of Greek Yogurt?! And what if it beat my mom's all-time winner, Disney World? Oh, the glorious thought!
As I pulled into the parking lot, coming off my high, I realized that I'd unfortunately forgotten that in order to go the grocery store, you should look a little more "public-ready." I wasn't naked or anything... but my sweatshirt, gym shorts, and unwashed hair (which I'd been pulling out all morning due to O's purging day) was quite a sight. What if I won the grand prize, and they needed a picture? Oh, Lord, please, no... the grocers would be all like:
And I'd be all like:
I walked in, calmly, like it was no big deal, and told the clerk that I'd received a voicemail saying that I'd won a prize, gave my name, and to my great relief, she didn't pull out a camera, but went to find my prize.
Then it happened. The moment had arrived. I was going to get my prize. It would be so spectacular, so enthralling that when I brought it home to Mr. D, he was going to start weeping with happiness. She handed me a blue bag. I said thank you, trying to hold back the excitement.
I looked around, taking in the scene, knowing that I was soon to join my mother's ranks of winningdom... I opened my bag...
And the grand prize WAS:
Fish Oil. Cod Oil. DHA Children's Supplements.
^ My thoughts exactly.
I called Mr. D on the way home, explaining our...winnings.
Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful. We actually do take Omega-3's, so they'll get used.
But as for the fanfare and the ability to say that my mother's 'winning' genes had passed on? Well, not so much.
Hey, it's still a win in my books. On that note, here are some other "winners."
And this one for good measure:
It's aliiiiivvveee!!!!
Signing off - M.
12. Our temporal thermometer. 
15. The Hunger Games audiobook.
19. Check marks on my to-do list, regardless of how few.
